Kiss In The Rain

As I walked up the stairs, I thought of my father replacing our old creaky ones, with brand new steps. I was glad at the moment for that. My footsteps ...

He continued to pound my mother with punches, screaming out, “Why do you disobey me,” over and over again. After a few minutes of blows to the chest, arms, and ...

The “Right Here,” was discovered after the storm, tossed onto a rock outcropping, with no trace of its owner anywhere. :arrow: "Right Here" is italicized. :arrow: "... tossed into a ...

Hiya, I'm back. :) On to the reading and the editing! joyful, “Hello?” Aww, first sentence this time! "hello?"! Dr. Grigori, Alfred’s personal physician, “What happens to be the occasion.” ...

:D I'm back again! I swear, this chapter wasn't as grammar-challenged. *laughs*. Sorry, I'm just trying to keep it light. Anyway, very nice, very nice. You might consider adding some ...

So, I'm editing as I go along. NitPicks Alfred Tishman sat at his piano. He sat at his piano and stared at it, just like he did every day at ...

“It matches with your eyes,” he whispered. I would omit the "with" The gold dress has given her is Add a "he" before has and whether that the laughter that ...

1. Are you getting a feeling for Jason and Sierra's characters? 2. How's the pace? Do I go too quickly/slowly? 1. I think so. I like Sierra's personality. She is ...

Hmm, I liked it. I find Jason rather a mysterious guy; and I disagree with Chernobylly. I'm sure he will be an interesting character. I like Sierra. She's a little ...

Hmm, is there more? It's fine the way it is, if it is not. I was just curious. Anyway, yes, gossip is a pretty bad thing. Being the subject is ...

Oh, wow. This is pretty interesting. The first paragraph/prologue/into to this piece is enticingly delicious to the mind. I'd like to find out what it all means. All the grammar ...

___________________ :?: Critique Questions: 1. What do you think so far? Is it moving along? Are you bored? 2. What about the characters so far? 3. I've never had to ...

Hello, Autumn. A very nice piece of work. I disagree with some of your previous reviews. This is a fine prologue; it isn't supposed to give away the story. And ...

Ha! I liked the idea, Em, really. It was sweet and simple. A nice piece of work. I have a suggestion. You really liked your Dandelion Kingdom; why not write ...